It's for quite a long time that I have kept some of my experiences for myself. I have only told them to a few people. Now I think is the time that I will share them to the public. You might think that they are simply stupidity and don't have value -- nonsense. Think whatever you want to think, of course, you are free to do it. However, for me they are a source of encouragement, a medium where hope and ambition will flourish in my heart and enlightened my mind to such possibilities.
In 2003, I had a vision. It was noon time, I was sleeping in my little room alone. When I woke up, the room was dark. I looked around me, my eyes were caught by a faint light seemed to be coming from the latch of the door. I stared at it for a moment. To my amazement, slowly, it grows longer and longer. As it grows, it shows different shining colours. The thing resembles a thick rope, and the strands near its end were loosed and keep on moving in any direction, like a bunch of snakes. The strands themselves were composed of vivid light in various colours. The whole thing was surrounded with a hollow-like glowing light in different hues. It was restless, while lengthening itself. I was shocked, I couldn't move. Like a dog's tail, the loosed endings that looks like the head, veered to my direction trying to reach me. For the second time, as the snake-like thing flung itself to grab me, I lost control, I shivered with uncontrollable fright, then the apparition disappeared. If it hadn't, I might have collapsed or go insane.
Well, no one could explain to me exactly what it means. Individuals, who claim to know mysteries have different versions. Months later, though, I would be ushered to a certain organization that would make my hair stand on its end. Why? Because, there foundation day was my birthday. Coincidence? I don't know. What's more, they told me something that I didn't want to believe. For who am I to be the person whom they said I am or I will be. But as look at the circumstances of where my life is leading me perhaps they are right. And here it is: I might be stupid to believe it, but if it's worthwhile to be stupid just to make things happen, I will dare do it.
I was there sitting. Apparently, my friend who invited me there had told them already the vision that I had. A few moments later, I was asked to go on the flat form to share what I had seen to the members attending the meeting. With a microphone in hand I went to tell them with excitement my story.
Later, as I was on my seat again, I was asked for the second time to come to the stage for they have something to tell me. What I heard at that time seemed like I was part of a character in a movie show that my logical mind doesn't want to believe. All I could rationalize was that these people were tricking me so I would be part of their organization. Who could have believe it when they told me that "I am the bearer of light." For me, at that time it was totally, silly. Even now, I am still doubtful of what they told me. However, if it will really happen to me that I can enlighten and help people with their problems, well, there's no way of escaping it. Anyway, time will tell. At the moment, I am just a very ordinary personal, without extraordinary talents that could attract people's attention. Only, that I am experiencing strange phenomenon.
Then my vision was followed by a vivid dream. In my dream, I was walking in a well-paved and spacious place. I was feeling grand self-assured and at my best, with my chin up like I was a noble man or a military, perhaps. I saw all around me, a battalion of guards, so many, they are all protecting me in all direction. Seeing this one, I suddenly realized who I was, so I said to myself, oh! So this the feeling of being a president. The sensation was really so elevated, I was so pleased and ecstatic, for it means achievement.
Later, in my dream, I was alone. Then, I found myself holding the pendant of the necklace hanging around my neck. The pendant is an emblem, which symbolizes my status as the president. Looking at it, I was in deep thought, I was thinking how can I improve the pendant's design to really represent my leadership as head of a country, then I woke up.
When I woke up, it was not difficult for me to recall what took place in that dream since it was so vivid, like real. Although it was just a dream, but I just couldn't comprehend why I happened to dream like that. At that time, my mentality was so simple. I was not aiming for high position in the society. But why I had that kind of dream?
How I was found on the Net by my niece and my returned to the province in the right time despite problems that would supposedly hinder my travel is quite of a story also. And how I was engaged in painting and a lot more couldn’t just be put into the category of chance, there must a plan in all of these. I won’t be telling these stories here, what I will tell you instead is the visit of the most famous personality, a mentalist and world-known spoon bender, Uri Geller, an Israeli, and a friend of Michael Jackson, not in person, but in a dreamlike condition, while I was suffering a fever for a week. Here is how it happened:
Approximately, four months ago, I was living in a squatter area. My place is a squalid and rat infested room, where I could see dungs scattered on the floor every time I went home. Because of my financial status I was still able to manage staying there for six months because of its cheap rental of one thousand pesos only.
However, after I arrived from the province I moved to a cleaner place, though still a squatter area. My room has its own toilet, which I like. The rental of course is a little bit higher, considering the fact that I don’t have a job yet. The second day of my stay in this new place, I started to feel bad, my temperature went high, and I was losing my appetite for food. For a week I suffered that ailment. One night, while I was delirious, I can’t sleep, my mind kept on wandering, creating stories and sceneries in a dream-like manner – perhaps it was what they called hallucination. It was in this state that Uri Geller appeared to me. In that state of my mind, Uri talked to me. He told me something, after that, he went away. When I was well again and pretty much awake that night, I couldn’t recall anymore what Uri has said to me. Because it appeared that he was instructing me of something.
The next day, I went to the park together with a friend. We passed by an acquaintance and have conversation with him for a while. This guy took out a fork from a plastic bag. My friend seeing the fork asks that guy to give it to me, so I could have something to use at home. In that instant, I thought of Uri Geller and his appearance the night before. I just couldn’t believe it. Is it a coincidence? Oh! Know not. There might be something in it.
Because, I couldn’t contain my emotion, I sent an email to Uri. The next day, I got a response, and I was so honoured that someone as famous as him could still have the time to response to my email, personally. The email said it’s coming from his Black Berry.
I first know Uri Geller from the books written about Michael Jackson. My other source also is a book published on an experiment done on him in controlled laboratory settings in the United States. Later, I got to know him more on the Internet. The last video I watched of him, before his appearance in my hallucination, was an interview of him on vfm.33, an FM station in Greece.
This is the response of Uri sent to my email:
I am so excited thinking what will happen next. Every now and then, I am comforted with encouraging dreams of courage and achievements that could only be categorized as Miracles: achievements that could only be possible through an intervention from God. At this moment in my life, I am learning to pray, really talking to God, in whatever form possible. There will be time in our lives that someone will come to our orbit to teach us something. And that was what happened to me. I was only thankful that I became humble enough to learn something. Normally, by nature, I am not a very emotional person, I am not moved, cry, or feel a very strong emotion easily as I have seen mostly in most people around me. But just a month ago, I had this dream that I was traversing a field of greenery. It was a huge and open area. I could see far in the distance, a chain of mountains surrounding the place. It was a fantastic sight. I admired it so much. Though the scenery was a tremendous sight, I was not walking there without pain. I felt a strong cold wind blowing on my body and I had this sorrow so deep, that I sobbed in a way that I felt I was dying. It seemed all my guts would fall out. I was out of breath, my body, my spirit and soul -- every atom of my existence was shook to its very foundation. I was in a deepest emotional state of sorrow, imploring God to help me. The sensation was so strong that words can’t almost describe my need of help from God. Flowing from my mouth were the words: God, p l e a s e help me!!!!!!! P l e a s e help me!!!!!!! P l e a s e help me!!!!!!! All over again, in utmost agony, humbleness and sincerity. Then out from nowhere, I saw the face of Manny Pacquiao. And then I realized how Manny could have been so thankful to God, and could have felt the way I feel. Still, I braved the strong wind and continued on my way crying in total exhaustion. By the time I woke up, I still felt the pain in my heart because of sorrow. I was in that condition for a little bit longer before I was able to recuperate.
When I was back to reality, I just don’t know how I could be so emotional like that in my life. It seemed like impossible for me to feel such deep emotion. In my day to day existence there are times that I sincerely ask God for assistance, especially when times got tough that seemed to offer no way out, but still, I just couldn’t have that feeling of complete reliance and sincerity coming from my heart and not from the mind, like that in my dream.
I believe that all of these things that have been happening to me have deep implication to my personality. Moreover, these occurrences are telling me something. How I wish I can understand them. I need wisdom. And true wisdom only comes from God. Before, when I was still lost in a world of despair, I tried to ignore the presence of God, for He was not helping me after all, I reasoned; my life was a misery. Even though I was always hearing that sentiment from people who have undergone difficulties, but still the same, I was acting in the same manner.
My views has drastically changed when God gives me the opportunity to feel how it is when you are calm and have more control of the mind’s activity to achieve deep calmness that my outlook in life changed. In this changed state, I saw the goodness of God in almost every situation I was in. There are still sorrows, troubles and heated moments, but they are more controllable than before.
Whatever the outcome of my life, time will tell. If God wants me to share something of importance to all, then I am happy to take the challenge, but if all is just my imagination and not coming from God I can’t make a difference in this life. The stories of my life that I once thought to be of value to all will be lost forever. For the moment that I still have the courage and will to do what’s in my heart, I’ll better go for it.
In my writing this blog, I am in a state of financial trouble that would probably send me to the streets again. This condition is also the mean reason that goads me to write these stories you are reading now to attract people’s attention to support me. Hoping that people might be convinced, and will listen to me that there might be something worthy out of my life after all. Of course, nobody knows what will happen next, but I am optimistic.
Right now, I am here in a frenzy writing blogs and creating new concepts or just writing my thoughts in my computer. I am so thankful to God that I have this computer. But you know? I have eliminated two viruses already: two while I was on the Net and another two in my flash drive. It’s good I was clever enough to scan it first before attempting to use it to speed up my computer.
Now, I am beginning to learn. I know, I’ve got a lesson. I am ready to accept what will happen to my life. But, if there is a way to implore God to make my life fruitful for the good of all, I will do it wholeheartedly. And day by day, I am humbling myself down and asked God’s direction. But if it is His will for me to pass in this world unnoticed then that is it.
The longing for recognition is a human nature. We all want to be recognized one way or another. And there’s nothing wrong about this, as long as it is in moderation, just within limit. Exuberance is bad and can destroy us being human and can turn anybody into a beastly nature. We should harbour the art of Acceptance and that means humbleness. It shows us the way to being obedient to God’s plan for us.
I will end this blog for the moment with the words: God’s will, will be done and have trust that His will is for our own good, for He knows everything. Who are we to argue when we don’t know anything at all about the future.
Soon, I will be telling these experiences in video form.
This blog will be continued.